DAY FIFTEEN-Change

Hello beautiful world and people out there, today is going to be amazing! I woke up filled with positivity and excitement for the day and the rest of my life for how I’m going to turn out to be! Because I feel that I’m healed. I seemed to have found the answers to all those questions I’ve had in the past.

Why would people look at sunsets and feel connected to their souls or simply feel appreciative?

Why would people enjoy the company of each other?

How does happiness feel like?

How do two people fall in love?

I wonder if I was being silly having all these doubts and questions about life, about people, or that I’m different from normal people. I want to believe that I’m special. There are endless possibilities in life and I’m really really excited to live it a different way than it was before. I was limited by the uncomfortable feeling from overeating and my incapability to feel and love. So yes, heal this, I can have it all. 

This self-discovery trip back home in Malaysia is the best thing that ever happened to me. I’m thankful for that I get to know him, and the time we spent together made me realized how insensible my life had been.  I’ve discovered sides of me that I was never aware of. I understood what shapes the current version of myself and the explanations behind my actions and decisions. I got most of the answers of the questions that are always hanging in the background of my conscious. Most importantly, I can feel fullness after a meal now:)) When I stop eating after I feel enough, my body doesn’t feel sluggish and turgid. I feel energetic again to do what I need to do. All these years I abused the purpose of eating. I always felt stuffed and guilty after consuming food for the reason that I didn’t know when to stop, I didn’t want to stop. At this phase where I just started having this consciousness about fullness, I have to constantly remind myself about contentment, that I’m no lack of food, so there is no need to overeat. Until I make this a habit, until this is my unconscious competence (according to Julian).

I’m very excited to see my body changes over time for that I changed my perspective on working out and my approach to eating. I no longer feel obligated to workout EVERY SINGLE DAMN DAY! This is one huge progression for Claire.

I’d like to set an intention for myself– Ahimsa | Non-violence on my body and speech.

 

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